七夕情人節

有一个孤单的七夕情人節。。。。

我等的人，她在多远的未来？
我排著队拿著爱的号码牌


我怀念的是无话不说
我怀念的是一起作梦
我怀念的是争吵以后
还是想要爱你的冲动
我记得那年生日
也记得那一首歌
记得那片星空
最伤人的话
最让人心碎
谁记得
谁忘了
我放手
我让座
假洒脱
谁懂我多么不舍得
太爱了
所以我
没有哭
没有说

Life like a roller coaster ride

Recently I feel my life is like having a roller coaster ride.

It go up and down and take some spin sometime.

First I notice my new pc start to behave abnormally.
It will just reboot itself sometime. And even when it is not, it will still crash the firefox or chrome when I browse facebook.
So I try to tweak a little bit and play with the driver, software etc to get it updated.
But all gone bad when I try to reinstall the Window 7.

So I send the PC back to the seller and ask them to check.

The roller coaster ride looks like going down for me at that time.

Then, I got a call from a head hunter, asking if I am interested with a new job.
It sounds very very very good offer. As the company will send me to Germany for training for a year.
I am very glad at that time.
And the next day another head hunter call and ask if I am interested to be the team lead for a bank helpdesk.
Not bad either as considering that this is a team lead position.

And now the ride is going up again...

But the ride turn back down when I go for my travel visa application, the document I provide is incorrect and I need to go again. They do not accept photocopy or scanned document. Must be original with hand signature.

Lucky, when I am back in the office, the HR have pass down the original copy so it should be fine.

Then after a few day of no further news, I guess the head hunter decide I am not suitable for the job. No more call from them for any interview.

Then yesterday I went to the Embassy for the 4th time and get my visa on the same day. But to my surprise, that visa is only valid from 23 July 2012 till 23 Oct 2012. That means it will expired before my travelling date. I was like "What happening!!?!?!" The officer just explained that it is like this and I should not apply so early. And nothing he can do to change it.
The only choice I left with is to submit a new visa application after the current one expired.

The roller coaster ride is going down down down.....

The new 86

Just got my first car. A Perodua 1.3l MyVI.
Coincidentally the plat number end with "86" again. So this is 86 2nd generation.
More powerful. More VROOOMMMMM

So, to all my friend, I need sponsor for my car decoration.

Please help as much as you can.

I am now certified Car Loan Slave. Every month need to pay RM1,000. (>.<)

Are you lonesome tonight.........

多少個秋　多少個冬　我幾乎快要被治癒好
但還是會只因為一個重覆的話題　就無心自擾

也曾想過　若真遇見　我們應該如何是好
我想我還是會還站在某一個街角　不讓你看到

..........

我只好假裝我聽不到　聽不到別人口中的她好不好
再不想問　也不想被通知到　反正你的世界我管不了


A friend ask me am I emo? I guess I am not emo, just that never recovered fully........
I taught I have, but just can't help sometimes, wondering what is she doing now.
I never feel I have very good memory, but a lot of her just won't leave my memory.

And in lonesome night like these, the feeling just feel stronger.

Lots of my friend that get married last year start to either announce that they are pregnant, or the baby is born this year. Congratulation to them. I guess now they have a better reason to live, to go to work.

I remember I ask one of the friend, why get married? Her answer is don't want to feel loneliness. The feeling when you are all alone when you are sick is very saddening. Well I couldn't help but wander, getting married doesn't solved that. The spouse maybe going out with friend or need to meet client when you feel loneliness too. But that is the answer in my mind. I did not tell my friend these.

A game I have been playing, Diablo III, have a very memorable quote :

Enchantress : These land is so empty
Player (Demon Hunter) : Does that bother you?
Enchantress : No. There are an emptiness within me as well.

I like these word as it suit my feeling a lot. Emptiness within me as well.


Well enough of babbling about my life.
Let's update some of what happen to me recently.
Not much to say though, except that I still playing Diablo 3 and is in Inferno mode now. Level 60.

A little secret, I suddenly need to bought a new car this year and all my saving will be used up. To the point that I can't even survive this month without financial aid from my mom. But for some spooky weird reason, I have a dream one night. I dream that I bought lucky number and win the prize money. The number is the last 4 digit of my house number. And so I remember I keep hear 2741 from the back. And so I bought 1472 and win 2nd prize. The spooky part is right after I wake up, I remember the last 4 digit of my house phone number is not 2741 but is 7241. If I bought that number instead, I won't be winning the prize money. Feel it is like destined or an unseen spiritual force that help me to go thru this dark time of my life.

Also I hope to plan a trip for my coming birthday this year, but yet to decide the location.
Korea for Winter sound nice but too many preparation for clothing and will be a big hassle if I travel alone.
If Spring or Summer, then it will be much easier to travel around.

Another location I am considering is Bangkok? Feel like again to this city. But this year really feel peaceful. So I feel I should go back and show gratitude to the 4-Faces god(Erawan Shrine in Bangkok) that I pray during my last visit. I feel this is what help me this year.

Diablo 3

I guess this will be my biggest gift for myself this year.

Diablo 3

In order to play this game, I have spend almost RM 4,000.
RM3500 to build the gaming rig, RM300 for mouse, key board and external hard disc, RM200 for the game Diablo 3.
The price for the thrill and excitement, PRICELESS.


About the game itself, although it still name as Action RPG, the RPG element have been reduced to minimum.
Although the strength, dexterity, intelligence and vitality still there, but this has been preset growing stat. Not something a player can change depend on their playing ability.

The different skill that each class have also can be set and change anytime the player like. Feel more like a player can choose what type of gun to use depend on the situation. Like a FPS action game.

So is this a bad move? I feel it bring down the long dragging hours of leveling up the character and let player have more action. Nevertheless I still enjoy the game very much.

Btw, my pc now boot up super fast. In less than 5 seconds.

Love your job, but never Love your company

Love your job, but never Love your company
Because you never know when the company will stop to love you
And in most case, the company don't love you, appreciate you or reward you with gift and bonus

That is a a word of advice from a senior friend. And I always find this ultimate truth.

Sometimes it really demotivate me to work when I am making sacrifice for the company but not appreciated.
Like I continue to come work when I am not feeling well and the company treat me as I am lazying around here and not doing work properly...

Expiry Date....

不知道从什么时候开始，在什么东西上面都有个日期，秋刀鱼会过期，肉罐头会过期，连保鲜纸都会过期，我开始怀疑，在这个世界上，还有什么东西是不会过期的？

Somehow everything comes with an expiry date. Swordfish expires. Meat sauce expires. Even cling-film expires. Is there anything in the world which doesn't?


Quoted from the movie 《重庆森林》 or Chung King Express.

That is my feeling now.


I just found out Friendster have change. Change the interface etc. No email is sent to inform me to keep the old photo. They just delete it.....


The photo of a very expensive meal that I have with her got deleted just like that. Together with this incident, is my feeling got deleted just like that. Perhaps it is what should happen to a love that have past the expiry date. It is should be throw away. But why I just feel such a sadness in my heart?

I just feel melancholy again...