If I can turn back time.........

Since Friday, I have a weird idea. An idea that normally happen in movie, what if I am 18 again. What if I have 2nd chance to live my life.

Until today Monday, I still have this day dreaming idea.

Let see what I will do.

First is buy shares because I know September 11 2001 there will be a big big terrorist attack. Time for me to make profit. Really this is the first thing I think of, not how I will go try to amend a relationship with a girl. Not how to tackle the girl better.
Well maybe coz I don't have girl to tackle at that age (><)

2nd things that I think and I feel MUST do is, steal the whole Facebook idea. Register the domain first and create this social network. Muahahahahaha. If I can do it, I will be the number 1 billionaire in Malaysia. Even if fail, I must at least create Restaurant City, Pet Society etc.

3rd things that I think I MUST at least give it a try is to meet girl/model before they are too famous for me to date anymore. 1st in the list is Lin Chi-ling (林志玲). Before 2002, she is really a nobody. But after that year, she suddenly rose to fame and become super famous, super hot. 2nd in the list is Cica 周韦彤. Again another model that is totally nobody but is famous now....

4th is a list of property or house that I know price will rose very fast very soon. Persuade my mom to use all money for the investment.

Right now my mind only wonder to this list of things to do. I did not think of doing things like just go buy a 4D. Because I won't remember which date, what number is 1st price. But if I got the chance to turn back time the way I wish, then remember all the lucky number maybe is the 1st priority. :P

One funny or interesting things that I notice is, I never ever taught of anything to amend the relationship with my 1st gf or with that "kai mui". I think I miss them because I yet to find a better replacement for them. Once I find one, I will forget them totally.... Just like in my day dream, because I have 林志玲 as possible gf, I don't miss them anymore.

Movie and me....

Today is another public holiday that I need to spend working in the office. It is not really such a bad idea since going out on a holiday means pack anywhere you go.
Plus the hot weather of Malaysia, staying in office is not that bad idea.

Especially the work I need to do is minimal and watching movie is the main task. Hehehe \(^_^)/


Today I watch 2 movie. The first movie is call "No string attached"
A romantic comedy staring Natalie Portman and another guy that I don't care to remember his name. :P

Anyway the movie is about a girl that do not believe with Love agree to have a sex only relationship with a guy. Of course in the end she found out she so deeply in love and miss the guy. A very sweet movie. Not bad for a boring holiday afternoon.

But while watching this movie, I suddenly remember when me and her in redbox karaoke room. Just 2 of us sing K. and then because I mistakenly push next for a song she want to sing, she take my arm and bite me really hard. My reaction that time is beyond human nature. Because by instinct when we get hurt we will get away first. Like when we touch a hot kettle we will withdraw our hand faster then we can think.

But when she took my arm and bite, I feel so sweet. And I just let her bite it. She ask is it pain. And I just say no. It feel sweet.

I still remember the bite mark is so deep that you can still see it after more then half hour. And I took picture of it to remember it.

Why watching these kind of sweet romantic comedy movie will remind me of her? I don't know.


The 2nd movie that I watch is one of the best movie I have ever watch. A Japanese movie name Confession. I will recommend all people to watch this movie.



Just watch it and concentrate on each small detail in the movie. And you will appreciate the hard work of the script writer, director and everyone else.

The lesson I learn from this movie is never try to hurt or destroy anyone life, because revenge or consequence from it can be so scary that it is beyond all your imagination. Just like we human destroying this mother nature, the revenge can be seen and feel little by little now.

I am not trully happy.....

You Aren't Truly Happy--Mayday

In the middle of a crowd, you're crying
You only want to be a transparent color
You won't dream again, or get hurt, or have feeling anymore

You've already decided
You've already decided

You're silently enduring
Grasping yesterday tightly in your fist

However, the sweeter the memory, the more it hurts
The more it leaves scores of deep incisions in your hands.

You aren't truly happy
Your smile is only a camouflage you wear

You've decided not to hate and decided not to love any longer
To lock your soul away forever, inside yourself

This world laughed, so you sociably laughed along
You claim existence is a set of rules, And not your choice
So, you hold in tears, drift along, and stumble as you walk

You're not truly happy
Your smile is only a camouflage you wear
You've decided not to hate and decided not to love any longer
To lock your soul away forever, inside yourself

You aren't truly happy
Your wounds are still unwilling to fully heal
I'm standing just to your left,
Yet its like there's a galaxy between us
Don't tell me you're really going to hold on to your regrets until you grow old, only to regret?

You aren't truly happy
Your smile is only a camouflage you wear
You've decided not to hate and decided not to love any longer
To lock your soul away forever, inside yourself

You aren't truly happy
Your wounds are still unwilling to fully heal
Im standing just to your left,
Yet its like theres a galaxy between us

Don't tell me you're really going to hold on to your regrets until you grow old

You deserve to be truly happy
You should strip off your camouflage

After suffering loss, why still be punished?
Can you just let all the sadness end at this moment
and start living once again?


I have heard this song before, but I just hear the rhythm. Not the lyric. Thus I never notice this song suit me so well. The video above have let me see the lyric and this time, I feel want to cry as I watch that video.

I am not truly happy. I see people around me laugh and so I sociably laugh together.
I understand I need to be sociable to survive. I understand a lot of things that I need to do to survive. And these thing is not a choice of mine.
I am just drifting along, stumbling as I walk.

In drama, the girl/main actress will always have a dream. A dream of her future prince of charming, will do a very romantic things to her. And as drama always is dramatic, this prince of charming will appear and do exactly what she dream.

Now I hope the same thing can happen to me. A princess of charming will come and tell me. "I deserve to be trully happy. I should strip off my camourflage"


Some update on my life too... drifting on. surviving.
My left ear still not fully recover. This morning I have a check up with the specialist and he cut some of the inner skin in my ear because it slowly wall up the ear hole. It is so damn pain. And even now, I can feel it is bleeding....
As usual and like 99% people in this world, I need money. My wish list is long but for short term target, I want a new PC and I want to travel.

Series that I used to watch when I am kid...

When I am little kid, I like to watch those western series. And time change a lot as I don't watch it nowadays...

Anyway here is a look back of some series, starting with Macgyver.



Next to come is, AirWolf



Next to come is, Knight Rider... I use to imagine that this is my car in future. But sure I don't want it now coz it look so outdated. Hahahahaha



This message will be self destroy after this.... Deng Deng Deng..... *Mission Impossible*



And the last video, emm.... I am very pure and naive that time, when I watch this drama series.